It seems like everyone has a packed schedule these days. Many times, it’s the children that are the busiest of all. With everyone coming home tired and maybe at different times, it’s tough to find time to sit together and talk. That’s why we make a point to eat dinner together every night.
To make sure it’s not just a mindless gathering of stuffing our faces, we all have to play a part in making it enjoyable. These are a few things that help us enjoy dinner and help us train our daughter in proper etiquette.
Do’s:
- Everyone must help out – Usually I cook (or heat up something) but if I’m too tired my husband will take over. The one not cooking will clear the dining table of any schoolwork, mail, etc. that may have collected on it during the day. My daughter will get the drinks and periodically helps in cooking and getting the dishes/silverware.
- Everyone is ready and present – It is so frustrating to work hard on dinner then you have to call, remind, yell for everyone to sit down. To avoid the extra tension, we all know that when ‘Ready!’ is announced everyone should be sitting and ready to eat.
- Be considerate – This does not only apply to our daughter. My husband and I must set the example in listening and not interrupting. We each get a chance to talk about our day so there’s no competition in who’s first or whose turn it is. Also, while we encourage our daughter to express herself freely, it must always be in a respectful tone.
- Make it fun – There’s a lot of laughing and storytelling mixed into our conversation. This is usually the time our daughter gets our joke-a-day calendar and reads the corny joke for the day. We also do not use this time to discipline or criticize our daughter or each other.
- Be proper – Though we want it to be a relaxed atmosphere, we also want to train our daughter in how to carry herself when eating out or in other people’s homes. Use the utensils, sit straight with your legs down, chew with your mouth closed (no smacking), stay at the table until everyone is done, and if you have to let some gas out of either end say, “Excuse Me”.
Don’ts:
- No distractions (laptop, iPhones, reading) – This is something that we all have to work hard on and sometimes we need to remind each other. We actually keep one laptop on our dining table where I usually sit (don’t have that much room) so I have to be sure to put it to sleep so I don’t get tempted. We also have two iPhones that we have to resist from updating our Lil’ Pirates. Reading magazines, newspapers, and books are also discouraged during this time. With no distractions, we are forced to talk and learn to like it.
- No complaining – Some dinners turn out better than others and it may not be someone’s favorite. Despite that, we show respect and consideration to whoever cooked by refraining from derogatory comments such as, “Oh no, we’re eating that again?” or “Eiuw, this tastes gross.” While it’s not expected that everything is savored fully, it is expected that we will taste each portion on our plate.
It sounds like a lot but it’s really not. We have been consistent in applying these things for many years and it has contributed to everyone enjoying our special time at dinner together. So it may take a bit of work and a lot of ‘reminding’ but it really pays off. In addition to that, we also know that our daughter will be respectful and a good dinner guest when with others.
Disclosure: I wrote this blog post while participating in the SocialMoms and Kraft Homestyle Macaroni and Cheese blogging program, for a gift card worth $50. For more information on how you can participate, click here.
